caudelac: (Amuse me.)
This weekend, my Grandmother passed away. It was her choice to do it the way she did (nice and quiet in her sleep, having said, "no, done with hospitals," and she had family with her. B and I said goodbye a month and a half ago, which is good, since we cannot make the memorial this Friday. Still.

I had other things, and I probably still do. General Lemarque is also dead. Barricades up.

And the rest is all Girl, you better work.
caudelac: (look what's in me!)
I am happy today, because yesterday was good. There were games and parties. There was sangria and eggnog and deliciousness and talk awhile of Dust to Dust. There were people I love and adore, and a boy I love more than that. These are all very great sources of joy to a Rabbit.

Soon, we shall go and have lunch with B's folks, though there is a blowing snow falling. It does not seem to be sticking at all, so that's all right. I wouldn't mind sticking snow, but we are in GA, as you might have guessed, and must return to NC this evening. Being stuck in the snow in SC or anywhere between appeals not at all.

For those who may have wished to comment on my last post, I thank you for your intention. The reason that I disabled comments, however, was that while it was a very sad thing, it was also... I didn't feel bad, and I wasn't depressed. I was mourning, and I needed to mourn, and I mourned till I was done, and there wasn't anything to say to me, really. It was all sad, but it was good too. I will add only that I really wish many of you could have met my godfather. Really, everyone who knows me at all should have known him. For some people, you can meet their parents and you see how they came from this combination of folk. For me, you might be able to get that somewhat from my parents, but you'd really need to also know Warren to get the full picture.

And now I have said what I wanted to say, which is that, and also that I am happy. It's a fine thing. There are other, troublesome and worrisome and ugly things about, it is true and cannot be denied. But I am here, and thinking about different things, and B is working on a Harbinger of Doom blog post that I am eagerly waiting to read, and all of that is good, and I am, right now this minute, content.
caudelac: (wistful)
My father found out yesterday, and promptly told me, that my godfather passed away a bit ago. We found out today that it was the day after Thanksgiving. He was very sick, and had been for years-- living in a home. The last time I saw him was Thanksgiving of 2002, at which point he was nearly completely blind. I was still living with Shannon for chrissakes. I had spoken to him once or twice on the phone since, but... well.

All that aside, I didn't expect it. I knew it was going to happen sooner rather than later, but I still didn't think it'd actually happen. Hurts like a son of a bitch. Hard to explain what he was to us... an uncle, certainly, he and my dad were the ones who taught me about having a good debate, philosophical, historical, or religious conversation, and still like the people you were arguing with. We never got to go to Germany-- he never actually got to go back to Germany, actually, a place he loved and missed the rest of his life. There's still so many conversations and things he and I never got to have. And we... we were his entire family, pretty much, apart from his sister... I met his parents, we hung out with them in the desert one year, but they'd been gone a long time. And we were (me and my folks anyway) on the other side of the country. I'd missed him a lot already, and now-- well.

From what I understand, there wasn't a funeral or anything. B took me out to Irish Food last night, and let me cry and tell stories and remember and drink a car bomb in Warren's memory. So I'll tell you my toast to the man, based on his favorite old Scottish Joke, that he'd told me when I was far too young to be hearing such things:

To Warren "Bjorn-o" Amy, a man who would indeed appreciate it if ye emptied a bottle of good Scotch Whiskey on 'is grave-- and wouldn't even mind if ye filtered it through yer kidneys first.

Prost.
caudelac: (*facedive*)
So the little bastards finally managed it. After nearly a year of reasonable safety, my cats managed to knock down tthe birdcage and, by all appearances, kill and eat Oscar-the-parakeet while I was away at the King's Gate Event.

Well, fuck.

Cleaning and Laundry were already the order of the evening, but now it seems that they are a bare necessity, due to all the frigging feathers.

And so it goes.
caudelac: (wistful)
[livejournal.com profile] yuki_onna posted today about the death of Milorad Pavic.

He was one of my favorite authors, one of the primary shapers of my voice alongside Eco and Borges, when I was sixteen or so. The Dictionary of the Khazars entered my brain and changed it structurally, as I realised dimly that an adult book did not have to be chapter, chapter, chapter, close-- but could be lexical, could be a crossword, a riddle, a cyphre, a pack of cards, could come in differing editions that fit together, could tell different versions of the same story that seem impossible and yet, are all true.

I feel as though I should say more, and I feel as though I must not. I will mention, however, that his most recent novel Second Body, is available to be read in English direct on his website.

And well... Goddammit, Death. Just... damn.
caudelac: (wistful)
So I came down to Alivia's tonight for dinner and a bit of staring blankly into my computer in a place where Dead Space and a whole ton of household chores, at least, could not distract me from my purpose. As I walked, I passed one of my favorite restaurants, Anotherthyme, where I thought to stop for their delicious and incomparable raspberry cocotte either before or after dinner. (Dessert first! As they say.)

Only to discover that it was closed, for good. It's last day of operation was September 30th.

I weep for this place, which sold me my first underage martini, which had a lovely bar filled with reasonably priced cocktails, which once served me something blue that knocked me on my ass a full hour after I'd consumed it, which had the best desserts I have ever eaten, where you could get red zinger tea if you were for some reason not feeling alchoholic-- in short, which I loved. I mourn for their passing, the loss of an institution, and for all the raspberry cocotte I cannot now eat.

Hat over my heart, I mourn.
caudelac: (wistful)
My father used to sing me Peter, Paul and Mary songs when I was little. Some of my earliest memories involve him practising guitar with the melody to 'A'Soalin', and playing 'Puff the Magic Dragon,' and...

Well, yes. Mary Travers's death has changed my media mode to 'leaving on a jet plane' (best. version. ever.) and "Stewball".

Though 'She's like the Wind' will remain on my ipod too.

And for the sake of the styx I'd like something cheerier to post about. Anytime.
caudelac: (wistful)
Death has just ripped a red cyclone through this year, boy howdy.

Media flavours for the day: To Wong Foo and Dirty Dancing.

Don't judge me.
caudelac: (wistful)
I am also sad about the death of John Hughes. Hopefully all the copies of the Breakfast Club will not be gone by the time I get my netflix sent back. I have only seen that movie once-- [livejournal.com profile] yuki_onna made me watch it years ago upon learning that I had never seen it. It was marvy.

Ferris Beuller, of course, I grew up with. And I had already been in love with Mia Sara from being obsessed with Legend.

So those are my memories, take of them as ye will.
caudelac: (standing out in a crowd.)
I realise it is grossly unpopular to be rubbery over this thing, and the prevailing sentiment is one of cynicism and snark (and yes, LA shouldn't have to pay for the whole deal when the man's estate is more than enough to cover the memorial expense), but I am extremely sad that I missed watching Michael Jackson's memorial yesterday. Goddammit.

I did hear the snippets of it on NPR this morning, the Reverend Al Sharpton bellowing to MJ's children, "You daddy won't strange! What you daddy had to deal wit was strange!" And that little girl, voice meek and trembling, saying that hers was the best daddy in the whole world...

Yeah, I lost it. Weeping over the steering wheel on 147 towards 40 East.

This probably makes me completely lame, but I don't give a shit. I'd rather sniffle along with "Will you be there?" in my sentimental lameness, thanks much.

(Though Ke-rist, this whole business in China is pissing me off. When will the Chinese figure out that uber control of the media and of information is a poison? Much better to flood the people with so much information that they're overwhelmed and paralyzed as to what to do with or about it and...

...oh wait.)
caudelac: (ghetto)
Things left to do today:


  • wait for freecycler to drop by
  • Go to last hour of Michael Jackson memorial dance party downtown.
  • Pick up 30" blinds for the front room of the old house.
  • The windows.


2nd pass on kitchen floor is drying. Probably 1-2 more before it's done-ish. Spent about 3 hours scraping paint off of hardwood with goo-gone. Am wondering what of the many cleaning products I have used today has turned my fingers green. This is less than cheery.

I think an hour of regressing back to when I was in elementary school and bad meant good and a guy could be both a werewolf and a zombie and a legend all at the same time, and all of it was just hman nature, that'd be a good thing to have.
caudelac: (wistful)
So yeah, David Carradine was found dead today.

This kind of... well, hell. Y'see, among the things I write about, I've a Coyote, in the sense of Old Man Coyote, and damn if David Carradine wasn't just utterly Him. And it's odd that he's gone, not only because I enjoyed his acting, but for that as well.

Other than that, not sure what to say. But... yeah.
caudelac: (12 sided die-- geekness)
Dave Arneson passed away today.

I ran the second episode of my D&D campaign, dedicated to him. One of my players actually was in one of his games. Man, Gygax last year, now Dave.

in memorandam: DEAD ALEWIVES!



caudelac: (Arr!)
The best thing about Sacramento International Airport is that it has completely free wifi.

Going into Dulles in DC from here, and hoping to accomplish more rude things with yarn in the process. Or accomplish more in the way of sleep. Either way.

There is more and less both to say about what has passed here than I can fit into the narrow space before boarding and takeoff, so I will save it for another hour.

Good morning wherever you are, and here.

(And also, Also! Happy Natals to the splendid and scintellating [livejournal.com profile] shellefly, she of the lapis hips, the lapis lips, and the blue lapis, morpho-scourage of the high frequen-seas!).
caudelac: (Amazing!)
In Sacramento, or rather, in Elk Grove, at my uncle Darrel's house. Everyone seems pretty good, with the kind of good that is born of a lot of patron and sangria and other toxic substances. We're telling stories about grandpa and things-- pretty much all my cousins on this side are here, which is festive. Should be seeing my brother tomorrow, and more importantly, my nieces and nephews.

The landing was as clear and warm when dropped into Sac now as it was foggy and thick when I was here last time. The landing does not resemble the death that necessitates it, so it would seem. Tears were still there though, waiting at t he terminal door. It's nice to mitigate them with some laughter now.

Though... now mama is telling the story of our Alabama Powell relatives.

Oh lord, here we go.
caudelac: (king of the nervous)
Leaving for the Sacred Tomato tomorrow morning. Will be back mon/tues. Mom's side of the family is doing their own thing... still don't know a lot of details about what's going/gone on, but my mom seems to be... well, I'll know more tomorrow. Much in the way of sigh.

Trying to focus on work for the moment = doable, less than easy.
caudelac: (wistful)
My grandpa Beatty-- mom's dad-- died this morning. he had been... very sick, for a bit now. My mom's out in CA now, not sure if I'll be able to go out too,... finances and all.

Yes, this is the second grandparent death since Nov. This is a massively unpleasant situation for a number of reasons that I'll not get into right now, as I need to go to work.
caudelac: (climb the tower)
Going out to Sac next Friday, for Grandpa's funeral. Both my parents will be there, so hopefully will get to go and see my Grandpa Beatty too, as I know that mom will want to do that.

In the meantime, having a very relaxing visit here in KY-- [livejournal.com profile] vaukosigan's parents are awesome, and we got to hang out with [livejournal.com profile] stauffenberg and [livejournal.com profile] alliesutherland last night, which is always a good time. Today-- Lexington for fun and profit.

Also, got my present from the Other early-- an asus eeepc, which is marvy since I am travelling next week, and also the cord on my laptop is about dead. Also, it is exactly the machine I wanted, and it fits snugly in my messenger bag. I feel like Penny from Inspector Gadget with her computer book.

Now, to the showers with me.
caudelac: (wistful)
RIP, Mama Africa.

Miriam Makeba was a part of my childhood in the way that Paul Simon's Graceland: The African Concert video was a huge part of my musical foundation. 'Under African Skies' with her and Paul in that concert is one of the most gorgeous things I have ever heard. Even now, My mom and godmother and I would dance to Pata Pata in the den of my parent's house and whoop and holler and oh my god yes.

She will be sorely missed.
caudelac: (wistful)
Obama's grandmother died today.

There's really not much to say by way of commentary... but that is unbelievably sad, especially, y'know, /today/.

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